Ah, the dreaded first date. A million and one thoughts are swarming through your head.
Maybe he’s cuter in person. His sister looks normal. It’s sweet that he visits his grandma every Sunday. Is it a bad sign if Carly’s coworker said he ghosted her friend after three dates? I wonder if he lives in Midtown because it’s an easy commute to his office. Or is that code for Murray Hill? Does J.P. Morgan mean he’s definitely in investment banking? I wonder if he was in Kelley. Wait, it literally doesn’t matter. He’s 29. He likes to play padel and says he’s looking for somebody with emotional intelligence. Give him a chance.
All of this aside, arguably the most important question remains: does he know how to pick a good first date spot? While some may argue that a “good” first date spot is inherently subjective, I’m here to shed light on the specifications that make or break a good first date spot.
No reservation = bad first date. As girls, we like to plan. A lot. Choosing a place that doesn’t take reservations (unless there is a very clear backup plan in mind) suggests a lack of effort and/or research on their end. First dates are already awkward enough — I can’t think of anything worse than scrambling for Plan B with somebody you know virtually nothing about. Besides the fact that they think Friends is better than The Office, duh.
Location. A good first date spot is always in and/or adjacent to your neighborhood. If a guy makes you schlep to the Upper East Side from Tribeca, that’s an immediate no. However, be careful that he doesn’t choose a spot that is on top of your (or his) apartment. That’s code for “I’m gonna try to have sex with you later.” Absolutely NO judgment if you’re down with that, but just make sure he isn’t expecting it.
Ambiance. It’s important that he picks a place conducive to making conversation. Obviously, you want there to be a cool vibe, but it is far from ideal if you need to shout in order to hear one another. In the event there’s an immediate spark, somewhere with a booth/couch situation will definitely come in handy.
Price Point. I’m all for drinks over dinner for a first date. There’s literally no reason you need to buy me a full meal when we’ve barely exchanged five words. But in terms of how expensive the spot should be, the answer is it depends. There should be a positive correlation between age and price point: the older you are, the nicer the place. Places that are perfectly acceptable for a first date when you’re 23, likely won’t cut when you’re 32. That being said, if a guy picks a place that’s too nice, he’s likely an asshole.
Originality. With hundreds, maybe even thousands, of bars to choose from in New York City, it’s obvious when your date picks the first place that pops up on Google. I won’t use names, but certain spots are more cliché than a guy saying he orders tequila for the table. I can’t speak on behalf of all single girls in Manhattan, but I’m looking for somebody who is willing to go the extra mile (and, obviously, has good taste).
Keeping all of this in mind, I’ve rounded up all the first date spots that scream, “He could be the one.”
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